we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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