I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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