Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize