They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
