My underwear smells like fireworks.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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