yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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