Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Randomize