508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
