All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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