I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
How's work?
Spinning.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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