She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
