he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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