Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
now i know why i became what i already was.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Randomize
