i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
