so explain again why im purple
no
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
