I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
