my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
