No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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