I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
