Dual....:-)
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
