So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Randomize