I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
