i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
