Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I can tuck mytits in my pants
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
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