I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
be right there i have to get my cape
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
