He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
