do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize
