Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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