does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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