why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
