How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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