We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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