he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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