I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Randomize
