I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
