OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Randomize