Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
