I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize