i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
