she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
