how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
