piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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