how can u be prego again
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
