My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
