I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
