hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize