Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
