We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
