Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
