So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
operation harelip BJ is a go
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
