HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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