oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
