Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
